Some Very
Important Facts
About Video Production
Q: How many directors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One
stand by to change the light bulb
take one!
Q: No, really, how many directors does it take
to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one more, guys, I promise, and then we'll be done.
Q: How many title editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fuor.
Q: How many lighting guys does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: That's "lamp," moron!
Q: How many writers does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: "Does it have to be a lightbulb? Look, let's talk about the concept of
this lightbulb thing
"
Q: How many of the talent does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three
two
one
uh, I'll do that again.
Q: No, really, how many of the talent does it
take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. One to change the lightbulb and three to mutter "That ought to be
me up there."
Q: How many volunteers from the magic club
does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Nobody knows; lightbulbs last longer than volunteers from the magic club.
Q: How many camera operators does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Leave it alone; I shot it that way on purpose.
Q: How many producers does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: Never mind, we'll fix it in post.
Q: How many live truck operators does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. It looks fine here the problem must be on your end.
Q: How many sound men does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: @#$%^& - I think it's - /*&::^buzzzzzzzzz
Q: How many grips does
it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to change the light bulb and four to
tell you about the one they changed in LA last year.
Q: How many onlookers does it
take to change a lightbulb?
A: Once they stop walking through your shot, staring at the camera, it takes
three: One child to cry in the middle of a perfect take, one to bump into the
lighting fixture until the lamp filament breaks, and one to say "I THINK HE
HAS TO CHANGE THE LIGHT BULB."